Police Report Case Number: BF S8008
Incident: Breaking and Entering, Stolen Property, Unauthorized use of Munition
Reporting Officer: A. Mutt
At about 0100 hours on 3rd August 2009, Northeast Resident Jamie Schumacher returned to her workplace (one Altered Esthetics) to retrieve a forgotten purse. As she entered the premises, she noticed the west window had been smashed.
Ms. Schumacher dialed for aid immediately, at which point she was approached by the purported culprit. Witness reports a thin, odd-looking man of moderate height with an articulated beard, a black hat, and otherwise "arduous dress." The culprit retrieved a large stack of papers from atop a counter display case and "with a small bang and a cloud of smoke, he disappeared."
In corroboration with the witness account, gunpowder residue was found at the scene. No vehicle was seen. Due to the nature of the residue, the nefarious description of the culprit and the implications involved, detective D. Tracy has been assigned to the case.
Reported Missing: 1,973 copies of publication "Big Funny" 50+ works of original art 1 calendar 1 box matches 1 comb
Residents of Northeast Minneapolis are advised to be on the lookout for unscrupulous characters. Altered Esthetics is offering a reward to anyone with information that leads to the arrest of the persons responsible for this henious crime.