Big Funny Stolen?!

Police Report Case Number: BF S8008

Incident: Breaking and Entering, Stolen Property, Unauthorized use of Munition

Reporting Officer: A. Mutt

At about 0100 hours on 3rd August 2009, Northeast Resident Jamie Schumacher returned to her workplace (one Altered Esthetics) to retrieve a forgotten purse. As she entered the premises, she noticed the west window had been smashed.

Ms. Schumacher dialed for aid immediately, at which point she was approached by the purported culprit. Witness reports a thin, odd-looking man of moderate height with an articulated beard, a black hat, and otherwise "arduous dress." The culprit retrieved a large stack of papers from atop a counter display case and "with a small bang and a cloud of smoke, he disappeared."

In corroboration with the witness account, gunpowder residue was found at the scene. No vehicle was seen. Due to the nature of the residue, the nefarious description of the culprit and the implications involved, detective D. Tracy has been assigned to the case.

Reported Missing: 1,973 copies of publication "Big Funny" 50+ works of original art 1 calendar 1 box matches 1 comb

Artist depiction:

Residents of Northeast Minneapolis are advised to be on the lookout for unscrupulous characters. Altered Esthetics is offering a reward to anyone with information that leads to the arrest of the persons responsible for this henious crime.

Chicago, Niagara Falls, Earwax and Dead Animals

Nick and I left for Chicago on Friday, June 12th. This was to be my first time in Chicago (for more than a layover) and I was pretty excited. We rolled into Chicago traffic around 5:30 or so, making it to the Double Door on time for load-in. Rather than try to make a story about every little thing and bore you with the details, here's a quick summary of what I remember about my trip to Chicago:

• Sleeping in the car in an alley while the L rolled overhead, the sound of the rain on the moonroof
• the Earwax Cafe (and wishing we could have gone)
• A not-so-great Chicago Dog from the Underdog across from the venue
• Melanie treating us to a midnight snack: The Best Burrito, consumed at 3am in a parking lot, huge enough to share with Daryl and us both to be full
• mmmmm deep-dish pizza from Pizzeria Uno
• The basement green-room of the Double Door and the hallway that smelled like a mixture of water, urine and fruit spray
• Super awesome breakfast and family time with John, Jocelyn and the kids
• "Washing" and changing in the Village Starbucks bathroom
• The copy center in the Village -and a picture of the owners with President Obama
• A ginormous lake of some sort
• Guitar stores actually worthy of visiting
• Dropping my cell phone on a busy Chicago street, in a puddle, and my cell phone no longer functioning
• Driving and scrambling from Tmobile to Tmobile in an attempt to get a loaner phone for the rest of my trip
• Traffic to rival Los Angeles (but not quite)
• Public Transportation and People On Bikes (yes, these still excite me.)
• and of course - two awesome nights of two awesome shows.

In a nutshell: Chicago was awesome and I hope to go back - with more time to spend doing some of the arty business I so enjoy. (And also - to consume foody goodness at the Earwax Cafe.)

We left Chicago late Saturday night. Nick decided to accompany me on my mini-adventure to Niagara Falls, as he had never been there either. We rolled into the Niagara Falls area Sunday evening... the weather was perfect, the area was not-too-crowded, and we were both ready to Not Be Driving.

Niagara Falls is definitely one a tourist attraction WORTHY of being a tourist attraction. (No offense, Biggest Ball of Twine in Minnesota.) Niagara Falls, Canada is a beautiful town. As we drove through on our way to the falls, we passed through storybook neighborhoods and (I kid you not) we saw ladies tending to gardens and men mowing lawns with cute little lawn-mowers. It was kind of surreal - I half expected Steve Martin to step out and say "What a day for a mow eh?"

We did all the touristy Niagara Falls things we rightly should have done. (See obligatory by-the-falls picture below.) We also did the Behind-The-Falls tour, which I really recommend for anybody that goes. Why bother going if you can't witness the immense, crushing, pulverizing power of the falls from every angle? (I'm not being sarcastic. It is pretty incredible and makes one feel quite tiny and squishable.)

Insert "awww" here.

The falls were beautiful, I heart rainbows, yadda yadda. ;)

I have a soft spot in my heart for buildings covered in moss that look line ruins. I heart them even more than rainbows.

We left the falls and the pleasant cityscape in the early evening, both of us in good spirits. As we drove from the Canadian side of the falls to the American side, the picture quickly changed. The first 7 buildings we saw were boarded up. The streets were strewn with litter and walls were plagued with graffiti, some covered, some not-so-covered. (And no, not mural art - this was graffiti-graffiti.) Later I learned that Niagara, NY has been not-so-affectionately (but somewhat appropriately) nicknamed "Little Detroit." I hope this struggling city can make its way out of this and recover some of what it has lost. Maybe if jerks like me stop recommending the Canadian side of the falls a little bit of tourist dough can make the way to the Niagara Falls, NY economy.

We drove through the night, and into the rain. We couldn't believe the amount of deer we saw on the first part of the drive - we stopped counting at 20. (Both dead and alive, unfortunately.) As we headed towards Massachusetts we hit turnpike after dark and forest-y turnpike. The rain was relentless and so were the long stretches with no services. After what seemed like forever and a day, the rain finally tapered off to a drizzle and we exited to the first Motel we could.

Canaan, NY.

In the middle of the night we navigated up a tiny road through the forest towards a creepy and eerily welcoming glowing red sign... "MOTEL... vacancy."

Setting up the story

There I was getting ready to write about my trip to Glacier when I realized I hadn't written much about the first trip I made this summer, or mostly the decisions that preceded it and the turbulence that ensued. So before I write about my more recent trip, I probably need to do a little bit of explaining. My last day of work at Bicycle Theory was June 10th, 2009. Long story short: As many of you know, I'm in graduate school full time (in addition to running the gallery.) Things have been going really well, but time was getting tighter and tighter. Though most of my classes up until this point took place on evenings and weekends, several of the classes I need to take this fall are right in the middle of the workday. On top of that, I'm also planning/hoping to take a double load and begin the application process for PhD programs. In order to make all of that feasible, I need(ed) the work/school/gallery balance to shift in favor of school's direction pretty tremendously. So I made the difficult decision to give up a good job with people I love and focus on school. Not necessarily the most "responsible" decision in this economy, but I felt as though it was the right one. Little did I realize that decision was going to give me the time to focus on even more than school as the summer progressed.

With all of this, (and partially because of all this) there were still a few things I still needed to figure out next. Traveling has always been really helpful for me both creatively and philosophically speaking. The second leg of Nick's tour was taking him eastward, the first stop was in Boston. After playing in Boston the band would tour additional cities along the east coast. Not having seen my Boston cousins in five years, I decided to take my own trip while he was gone. I planned to tag along for the first part of the tour until they hit Boston and spend a week with my cousins while he finished out the remainder of the tour.

Preparations for the trip were not seamless. On Monday afternoon we had a little hiccup, car accident style. As we turned left to enter the freeway, a car ran a red light, racing straight towards us. As Nick speed up and tried to avoid the collision, the car in question accelerated towards us, and I was fairly certain it was going to smash right into my side of the car. But every second counts in an accident, and instead of smashing into me the car swerved, smashed past the back of the car and raced away - only to run yet another red light and speed off onto the freeway, headed in the opposite direction.

Nick, with a surprising amount of calm, pulled over to the side of the onramp and began a discussion with a few witnesses to the accident. A little shook-up, I came outside a few minutes later. Bumpers working as they should, there was only a little damage to the car. A report needed to be filed and somebody had already called the police, so we waited. While we waited, I thought.

I think more or less sometimes the inhabitants of the world shake themselves out into many "kinds" of people... and we probably shift categories from time to time. Sometimes after an accident, tragedy, or significant event people show some of their "categories" with a bit more color.

The helpers: A woman who witnessed the accident immediately pulled to our section of the road, gave us what information she recollected of the other car. She gave us her information as well, in case we needed witnesses. Here's what else she did, which for some reason stands out to me more than the rest. As I exited the car and stood by the side of the road, clearly dazed, she looked at me, looked me in the eyes and with complete sincerity asked me "are you okay, sweetie?"

A gentleman on a bike managed to get the license number of the car. An Awesome Dude in a beat-up pickup truck pulled over to ask if "ya'll need any help?" A woman in a responsible car pulled carefully over to the side and, clearly nervous to walk out in a somewhat traffic-y area, asked us if she could help in any way. A young lady and her friend saw the accident as they entered the freeway, exited, and drove all the way back around to give us their information - "just in case."

This may sound like an overstatement, but I want to say it anyway: The Helpers help redeem my faith in the human race. Sometimes the world is so crazy that you can start to think everybody is selfish and in their own little world, oblivious to the others around them. Then something happens and The Helpers emerge, reminding you that there are enough people out there that random acts of good and kindness do still happen, often when you least expect it and most need it.

The Important Person: Then there are the Important People. The world revolves around them, you know. We encountered Important People on both legs of our trip, pretty much everywhere we went. Texting while going 90 on the NY interstate (no, seriously.) Speeding past construction workers on the side of the road (70 in a 40.) The list could go on. During our accident the Important People made themselves known by: honking at us and telling us to "get off the road" (we were off the road, pulled over to the side until the cops came), speeding past us and burning rubber once past to get in the freeway, and I suppose I should also include our Hit and Run friends in this category too. Important People are everywhere.

The Extras: While our world stopped, theirs didn't. That's okay - they are our extras, and we are theirs. The Other People on the freeway, the Other People on the road, the People walking on the other side... "We each play a starring role in the story of our life..." Sometimes we have smaller and larger roles in the cast of Another Person's Life... and sometimes we are just an extra.

Sometimes hours go by quickly, sometimes they take forever to pass. While we waited for the cops to arrive, I contemplated these things, the accident, my situation, the upcoming trip. When the cops arrived (over an hour after the accident) they gathered information quickly and sent us on our way.

As we left the scene of the accident, I couldn't help but feel a little bit anxious. Driving had all of a sudden become a little bit scarier and less-fun, and I was about to take the longest road trip I've taken since the move to Minneapolis itself.

He's a musician, and I'm an artist.

The past few weeks have been pretty intense. I've been doing a lot of traveling, a lot of reading, a lot of thinking. (But not a lot of posting. Sorry.) I went to Chicago for the first real (more than a few hours) time. I saw Niagara Falls. I drove past Mystic but didn't stop for pizza. I slept in a creepy MOTEL in the middle of nowhere straight out of Psycho but didn't die. I ate 10 canisters of Pringles. The barbeque kind are the best.

I'm home now and even though I'm not working at a "real job," I'm busy all the time. School, gallery, family, house. Not in that order. But there's one less thing on my list, and it's keeping me sane for the most part.

(Other things are making me insane, but that's beside the point.)

Here's what I wanted to post about.

While sitting at the beach in Humarock, I had a small personal revelation.

Figuring out my employment situation has been a constant struggle over the past few years. I decided a long time ago that I would rather make less money doing something fulfilling than make more money doing something not congruous with my own personal ethics. In other words, I would rather make half as much doing the accounting for a small nonprofit with a mission I believe in than work at a large corporation at which I felt alienated and disengaged, or worse - felt like I was doing harm to my community and the global environment.

I want to help make the world a better place. That has been a primary goal.

When I was in Humarock, I spent a lot of time with my family. I also wrote a paper for school and took a lot of long walks along the beach. One afternoon I sat on the shore and watched the waves crash against the pebbles along the shore.

"What can I do to make the world a better place?" I thought to myself.

I thought about that for a very long time. I've been thinking about that for a very long time. As I sat on the beach, my toes in the sand, I realized something.

The world is a better place. The world is actually a pretty fantastic place. It isn't perfect, but the world is beautiful, and amazing, and overwhelming.

The world is a better place... but it's how we perceive, process and interact with it (and each other) that is flawed.

When Nick and I crossed the border into Canada, the lady at the station asked us what we do for a living. Recently unemployed, at first I didn't know how to respond, so I blurted the first thing that came to my head. "Um, He's a musician, and I'm an artist."

I can run a business. I'm a good accountant. I can office manage the bejeezus out of any small business. I can build walls. I can stucco. I know how to use power tools. I can't play football. I can write grants and create development plans. I can facilitate strategic planning. I can work hard and be on time and be a good employee.

but I am also an artist, and sometimes it is all to easy to set that part of me aside for more "practical" things.

I'll be turning 30 in about a week. One of the things I wanted to do this summer is to realign myself with the things that matter the most. Over the next few months, I'll be doing just that.

Are you Jewish?

On Saturday night Nick and I went to The Cabooze to see our friend Erik play. I saw an artist-friend there and as I went to great her and give her a hug, somebody-it-seemed-I-should-have-recognized-but-didn't-recognize also greeted me, gave me a hug, and almost immediately proceeded to ask me what nationality I was. "Are you Jewish?" He said. "We weren't sure what nationality you were, and I thought you looked Jewish."

("Why?" I thought to myself? "Because I have a big nose? We'll that makes sense. All Jews have big noses, right? Of course! If I have a big nose, I must be Jewish." But that's not what I said.)

He had, in fact, used my nose as a measure for guessing my heritage. Interesting. I proceeded to tell him a little bit about my mixed ancestry, the condensed/bar version.  (For here, I can be a little bit more detailed.)

I have a big nose, yes. See? You can see my profile pretty well here, in this picture of me and Nick.

However even though I'm part Jewish, my nose isn't. My nose is my father's (thanks Dad!) and he's Sri Lankan, born in Sri Lanka. Let's see if I have a picture of my dad...

Perfect- here's me, my mom, and my dad at the cabin last fall. See the similarities? Of course in general, but also the nose in particular. My dad's nose is slightly more crooked than mine because he's been punched in the nose before... I think he used to box, just like Who's the Boss.

Sometimes people wonder about our last name (Schumacher) as it is not typically Sri Lankan. "So, you're Sri Lankan?" somebody might think. "Then what's with your name, and your nose?" Well, my family is Dutch-Burgher Sri Lankan. Our Sri Lankan roots go back to Deutschland, hence our German last name. My father came to this country in the 60's, where he met my mother and years later, had my sister, then me.

My mother is Polish. Her story is a little bit different.My Grandfather Chaim was born in Poland. He was raised in Poland along with his many brothers and sisters.On September 1, 1939 he fled to Russia (the Ukraine, to be specific.) It was there that he met my Grandmother, and they stayed in Russia throughout the war. Most of my Grandfather's brothers and sisters died in the war. At this point, I'm not sure how many (if any) are alive... but as I learn more about my family this is one of the areas I'm researching more. After the war my Grandfather and Grandmother returned to Poland, where they had my Uncle George and my mother. In the 1960's they moved the entire family to the states, and began a new life here. My father met my mother's brother, then he met my mother, my grandfather passed away, my uncle and grandmother returned to Denmark, my mother stayed here and the rest is history.

So, that's longer-than-the-bar-version-but-still-condensed-version of my family history... triggered in part by Saturday's interaction.

I'm not easily offended, in fact I've got a pretty dark sense of humor and will laugh at a lot of things normal people might not. So it isn't that this interaction offended me in any way... However, the interaction as a whole seemed funny to me, and not funny ha-ha.

My "jewishness" is a strange experience for me. When I was younger, I always just considered myself Polish/Sri-Lankan - American, because those were the countries where my parents were born, and America is where my parents became citizens, where I was born. It wasn't until I began investigating my heritage that I learned about the Russian/Ukraine, Dutch-Burgher and Jewish components of my ancestry.

If somebody asks me how it is that I'm Sri Lankan even though my last name is Schumacher I assume they're curious and will happily explain to them the intricacies of my unique heritage, of which I'm quite proud. However, if somebody asks me if I'm Jewish and it seems like they are only guessing that because I have a big nose I'll may just assume they're ignorant.

Occasionally when somebody does find out I'm Jewish, they'll ask about my history. "Oh wow, did any of your relatives die in the concentration camps?" It reminds me kind of when people ask about my family in Sri Lanka - When they find out I still have family there, they ask if any of them died in the Tsunami... As though it legitimizes my heritage to be tied emotionally to the tragedies of a particular people. It isn't that I don't want to talk about these things - I think we should talk about them, understand them, heal and learn from them. But the conversation itself can at times seem absurd. "Did you see that movie? Oh, I totally saw it too, it was great!"  "Did your relative die of some type of tragedy? Mine too, high five."

Then again, we connect with people all sorts of different ways. I suppose tragedy has a different way of bonding people, at least more than liking the same shoes. I guess one thing is just a bit more transparent than the other.

Long days, car accidents, record stores.

Today felt like one of the longest days ever, and it started last night. At about 7pm Nick and I heard the neighbor's dogs going crazy - not our immediate neighbor but an unidentifiable neighbor down the street.  The dogs would chill out anytime somebody approached the house, but would bark like crazy otherwise. You may know what kind of barking I'm talking about - that frantic, stressed and anxious bark.  It kept on until about 2am. I still have no idea what was going on - my best guess is they left the dogs out and were out until bar time, but who knows.

I woke up late but got to work on time, though I had hoped to arrive early as I planned to take a longer lunch. Nick was leaving today for tour again, and I had plans to drop him off at the studio space. Lunch wound up being longer than I expected though, for largely the wrong reasons. I came home from work about 12:45 and we left the house shortly after. As we approached the 94, turning left off of Broadway, a car sped past a red light, screaming toward us and clipping the back of our car, smashing the front right side of theirs.  They didn't stop. Instead, they ran another red light and raced onto the 94 going in the other direction. (The other direction we were headed, not the opposite direction of traffic.) Several witnesses identified the car and a guy on a bike got the license plate number.  It took over an hour for the cops to arrive, but we waited for them so we could file a report and get on our way. My back is a little bit sore but other than that, we're okay and uninjured. The car itself is a bit banged up - who knows how expensive that will be to fix. Thankfully we are INSURED and LICENSED so aside from our deductible, I think we'll be okay. (And I've yet to hear a good reason for anybody regularly driving while uninsured or unlicensed, so I'll go ahead and remain judgmental about that one.)

Wait - come back - don't you need these pieces of your light?

___

I dropped Nick off at the studio space and we were a bit surprised not to see the R.V., as we were over an hour late ourselves. (Thank you, Mrs. Hit-And-Run.) Apparently Daryl and Melanie were a bit delayed as well, so we unloaded Nick's gear to the studio and then I had to get back to work. It seemed (understandably) as though this departure was a lot less dramatic for the band. My goodbye to Nick was heartfelt, but my standard message to "drive safe" was a bit more meaningful.

Bicycle Theory was super understanding about me being late from the car accident, they've been pretty understanding about everything and super awesome and supportive in general. Crazy to think that my last day is Wednesday. (More on that later, I haven't announced that here I suppose.)

After work I met with Kristin and some of the curators for our fall shows. The meeting was long but incredibly productive, and I'm super excited about our shows for the rest of the year. A big concern of mine has been the quality of our exhibitions: I want to make sure we're keeping up the quality of our shows as we go through this next transition as an organization, developing our board and growing together. I have no doubt that the shows from August onward are going to be some of the best we've ever had.

On my way home, excited from the meeting but tired from a long day, I noticed what looked like a new record store on 13th. To my delight, it was - and a super awesome record store at that. Like, the kind of record store I would spend hours in throughout high school and college. They had the work of my artist-friend on the wall and that sparked a conversation; I talked to the owner and one of the store's designer's for about an hour. Super nice people, super awesome records, and they support artists too. Woot! There website is just a coming soon page for now, but in the meantime you can find them on facebook.

This is Adam, one of the owners. He had an 18 hour day and was super tired, just like me... You can see John's work on the wall - freaking fantastically talented, that guy is. If I wasn't going to be out of a job come Wednesday, I would totally buy some of his work. :) Until then, I'll just have to support artists the best I can through Ae... and my new friends in the district too. That's all for now. Time to cuddle with Molly and read a book.

Camping in Banning

Nick and I had an awesome weekend camping in Banning, Minnesota.

Some of the ruins in the area. It is amazing how fast nature can take over.

Kettle River is awesome.

We're getting pretty good at that one-armed picture taking thing.

There were beautiful flowers everywhere.

one, two, three...

four... five...

... ten gazillion trillium. They were EVERYWHERE!

More flowers...

This cute little purple guy stood out in a sea of white snowy trillium.

We don't want weeds in our bed... (but dandelions can be cute too!)

This butterfly stopped in the path right in front of us, sat long enough for me to take a picture, then flew away.  He was going to show me his magnum pose, but then realized he shouldn't even be talking about it right now.

Mr. Toad says hi.

A robin visited our campsite in the morning before we left for the day.

yay!

The best parts about the weekend: flowers, the river, hanging out by the campfire.  The worst part: TICKS!  omg. So. Many. Ticks. In the woods, on our pants, ick ick ick. Unbelievable. ::shiver::

A Whole New Mind

Read one of the most practical and enjoyable books I've read since reading Emotional Intelligence... A Whole New Mind.

It was suggested reading for my summer class, but I brought it to the cabin to read over the weekend and couldn't put it down once I started.

If I could, I would buy one for everybody on the board at Ae. Instead I'll have to pass around my copy.

Artistic friends: read this book. It will boost your self esteem and give you practical advice on how to sell your creative skills.

Analytic friends: read this book for ideas on how to encourage and stimulate your creative side.

Whole-minders: read this book and rejoice with me as we take over the world. ;)

A brief writeup from Daniel Pink's Site:

"Lawyers. Accountants. Computer programmers. That's what our parents encouraged us to become when we grew up. But Mom and Dad were wrong. The future belongs to a very different kind of person with a very different kind of mind. The era of "left brain" dominance, and the Information Age that it engendered, are giving way to a new world in which "right brain" qualities-inventiveness, empathy, meaning-predominate. That's the argument at the center of this provocative and original book, which uses the two sides of our brains as a metaphor for understanding the contours of our times.

In this insightful and entertaining book, which has been translated into 18 languages, Daniel H. Pink offers a fresh look at what it takes to excel. A Whole New Mind reveals the six essential aptitudes on which professional success and personal fulfillment now depend, and includes a series of hands-on exercises culled from experts around the world to help readers sharpen the necessary abilities. This book will change not only how we see the world but how we experience it as well. "

Dreams and updates

I had another "my brain is processing something" dream last night. I was walking around my house. (You know, typical dream house - not my current house but some strange simulacra of it.)

Somebody had recently given me a desk, an old vintage desk I had always wanted. I was convinced there was a place for it. As I walked around the house it became clear there was really no easy place to put it, that I had to make room for it. The room I thought it would fit didn't really fit after all and I had to crouch and wiggle just to get there.  I knew I had to find another place in the house for it to fit properly, and as I walked away from the room to figure out where I could make space I woke up.

A few things that stand out to me: The well of the desk was empty, and I wanted to fill it with things. The desk was a gift. I wanted to find room for it. The desk was wrapped in plastic.

I haven't updated my blog in awhile. The past few months have been very chaotic, but in a good way. I wrapped up a very intense semester and came out alive on the other end. (Though slightly like play-doh through the fun factory. The same substance, my form differently squished and mushy, my colors a bit askew.)

Nick went on his first tour. The experience was awesome - challenging but incredibly good for us. I got to meet him in L.A. and also spend a few days with my mom for mother's day, I'll write a post about that separately later. I feel like I fell in love with my best friend all over again, which is fantastic for us... but I'm a bit sad that he will be leaving again soon.

Work is going well, and I'm currently in the process of making some decisions there. I think some of the anxiety about those decisions is manifesting itself in various ways, including the dream I mentioned above. I had my 1-year review on Friday... crazy to think that I've been there for a whole year now. Time flies.

School as a whole is going well. I'm enjoying my classes, even though they are challenging. (Perhaps I'm enjoying my classes because they are challenging!) At this point, I'm contemplating moving on after this program to finish my PhD. It is something I really want to do, but finances are definitely a part of the overall equation I have to consider. I started my summer class immediately after the spring semester was over - no break at all, who set that schedule up?

The gallery is going well. The next few months I'll be putting in quite a bit of time training new board members and moving the organization forward, which has so far been a very exciting and rewarding process (again, even though and perhaps because of the challenge.) I am grateful to be working with such awesome people.

That's pretty much it for now. :)

Strange habits and sore legs

So, sometimes after a successful event or opening I come home with the warm fuzzies, super grateful, super excited, super encouraged. Often times I'll write little thank you emails to certain board members/interns/volunteers.  Sometimes I'm super excited, other times I just say thanks... but it comes from that late-night-tired-happy place and sometimes I worry - maybe I'm TOO excited? So, this morning when I woke up at 7:30 (without an alarm, go figure) achey and sore from unloading a gazillion cases of beer and wine from my car and all the running around, I thought ohhhhhh, what did I write last night, I hope it wasn't too over the top.

And I went through my sent box and re-read the emails, it seems like everything was okay. But still... what a weird thing for me to have to check. I guess it's like my own version of drunk dialing... oh, what did I say last night? (And no, I wasn't actually drunk, unless you can get drunk off of 4 cups of orange juice.)

Last night's even at Ae was awesome.  So many people helped put it together, so many artists donated works to support the cause, so many faces came out to celebrate, all in all it was fantastic. I feel very grateful this morning.

Exercise in Detachment - Books

I'm working my way through my "steps" and I started with books. I don't have a ton of time to sort these days, so I just did a little bit.  I think I need to be more hard about "slicing" things out. I pulled out 10 or so of the really great books I've read recently and brought them to tonight's board meeting. I gave a brief summary about them and what my thoughts were and offered them up to whoever wanted them. I encouraged them to share them with each other when they are done.  All but one book remained, one that was destined for another reader in the group not present at the meeting.

Books that I gave away:

Lies my Teacher Told Me - I read this book many years ago and have not touched it since, but it helped me realize concretely that not everything we were told in school was true, not everything in history books is accurate.

The Starfish and the Spider - Without question the best book I read last year. Recommended by a professor, it is a quick read and discusses the structure within leaderless organizations, the strength of leaderless systems, and how this theory applies to what is going on with terrorism, information sharing, etc.

Wikinomics - Fantastic, great read to accompany Starfish.

Groundswell - Even better than Wikinomics. Also recommended by a professor.

Ways of Seeing - Also recommended by a professor, but in my undergraduate. Noticing a theme here.

Emotional Intelligence - One of the best and most practical books I've ever read. I think everybody should read this book. Seriously.

The Pirate's Dilemma - Good book. Required for a class, but very applicable elsewhere. A great summary of the book is here:

Concern moving forward:

I am getting rid of quite a few things... and only keeping the things that I use, that are important. Considering this is an exercise in detachment, will the consequences be that I am more attached to fewer things (because I have little), rather than moderately/not very attached to many things because I have plenty?

Sri Lanka - Final Topic

So, after much thought and some struggle, I think I've settled on the following topic for the class. Modern missionaries: resolving the conflict between philanthropy, politics and proselytism in the war-torn regions of Sri Lanka.

As I continue reading and research, I'll be considering the following: - Role of different religions in modern Sri Lankan society - Philanthropy for poverty/Religion and the poor - The effect of natural disaster and tragedy on conversions - Brief history of religion, freedom and diversity of Sri Lanka (include, give context) - Brief history of proselytism (again, for proper contextualization) - Discussion: Transparency conflict – mission of religion vs mainstream philanthropic endeavors.

At this point I don't have much else to say, I'll just be reading. and reading. and reading.

An Exercise in Detachment

I haven’t been doing the country blogs because my mind has been a bit elsewhere. I plan to get back into it, but wanted to take on a more personal project for now. I actually began this process a few years ago, though I never fully completed it. I did complete one phase of it, enough to finally take the space in the house that had been portioned to me-and-just-me. I created within that space an “art room,” one where I can go to create, stretch, think, etc. It is simple, clean and somewhat tranquil in a house where elsewhere,animals rule. Now that I think about it, I probably don’t use it as often as I should.

Anyway, when I went through the process last, I sorted through about 10-15 boxes that remained from my move to Minnesota and from STPL to MPLS. These boxes contained more art supplies, books, etc - almost totally neglected for years. As I went through this process before I don’t think the procedure was fully fleshed out... and I think I have some additions that will help me have greater and more holistic success as I go through this again.

Life gets busier and busier and I constantly hope to accomplish, simplify, organize within it. (you should see my little lists!) Have you ever read the analogy of rocks, pebbles, and sand? That analogy, in combination with the buddhist concept of suffering and desire, applied to one’s life, can potentially allow room for more meaningful life experience. At least, that’s my underlying assumption here. Starting tonight begins the next phase of an exercise in detachment. I will journal as I go through it, but who knows - maybe this blog will be the next thing to go. (Just kidding.

• Step 1 - Identify “stuff.”
• Step 2 - Identify process (I think these first two go hand in hand, actually.)
• Step 3 - Create timeline for process
• Step 4 - Proceed with process
• Step 5 - Re-evaluate
• Step 6 - Proceed again
• (rinse, repeat.)

We’ll see how this goes.

About the Stuff

Initially I would think that I have much “stuff” - as I don’t really think I like “things.” I don’t collect crystal cats or anything like that, I don’t really like getting trinkets for gifts. I think me and my niece are like that in a way, though our homes are full of things, we really don’t like clutter and avoid it when we can. However, I’ve identified a lot of “stuff” I do have, and in order to simplify I plan to go through it and possibly - get rid of it. As I move through this “Stuff” I’ll do one of the following:

• Keep it (only if I can create with it, engage others with it, or if it is a USEFUL tool.) Examples: a deck of cards, a cooking pan, a paintbrush, a set of thank-you cards.)
• Re-purpose it (maybe it could be useful but isn’t in it’s current state)
• Give it away (if I think it will bring joy to somebody else or if I want to share it with somebody else or if somebody else can use it. For example: I have a set of books that I read when I was a little girl, my nieces read when they were little girls and I really want to give to Gracie, but I always forget them on the shelf.)
• Sell it (if it has value and I can pay down my debt from selling things I don’t need, why not?)
• Simplify it (I have something in mind here, this may make more sense later)
• Goodwill (give it away to a charity if I think it has value elsewhere than with me or with a direct connection.)
• Recycle it (Reduce, reuse, recycle!)
• Throw it away ( if it doesn’t fit into any of the categories above. I hope I don’t have much here in this category. )

So far, here is the list of “stuff” I have.

• Books
• CDs
• Photos
• Clothes
• Artwork
• Files
• Keepsakes
• Games/Toys
• Art Supplies/Tools
• Transportation
• Toiletries
• Cooking Supplies
• Movies
• Furniture
• STUFF-Stuff. (This is the stuffiest stuff I have.)

Goals

• My goals as I go through this are many.
• I want to practice detachment. Many of the things I have I keep only because they remind me of people. As I start to do this I usually stop partially through because I am reminded of the person. I’m going to find a way to keep the memory but get rid of the “thing.” I might blog more as a result, be warned.
• I want to make use of things not in use. I think many of us have this problem - we buy something or get something “useful” but it becomes buried under so much “stuff” we never actually use this. Weeding out some “stuff” might make more room for the useful tools.
• I believe life changes when we shift our environment. A few years ago, I stopped watching television. As a result, I think I’m able to do more, read more, act more. Less time is stripped away. I feel as though my mind has less “clutter” as far as advertisements and meaningless dialogue goes. (less, but still quite a bit. ;) ) I don’t live in a cave - I still watch things on the internet from time to time. I will watch The Office and Family Guy once in awhile, etc. The main thing is, I removed the “go home and watch TV” routine from my pattern and as a result my life as changed tremendously. I hope to have a somewhat similar result here - if I remove more clutter from my life, maybe I will have time for more creative endeavors.
• I want to remember. As much as I don’t want things, I do want to remember. I am in the mood to trigger the memories that come from these things, and I want to remember.
• There can be practicality here too: I think I have a few things that are new and/or unique that I will donate the Ae fundraiser or various other charity fundraisers where they can go to better use.
• I want to share things with other people. There are things I think that I don’t use that other people could use. I think I like sharing more than I like receiving and I’m excited to surprise people with things they might like that aren't being utilized the way they can.
• I want to inspire people. If I can do that as I give as well, that’s fantastic. (No, I’m not out to give away junk and glorify it by saying I want to inspire people, haha. I’m not cruel. An example of this may be: a few years ago I had a very nice pencil set I didn’t use frequently. I gave it a dear friend who is a much more active and fantastic artist than I could ever be. I gave it to her and she wore the pencils to nubs. THAT’s what I mean.)
• Not to sound morbid, but the less stuff I have, the less stuff people have to deal with should I suddenly pass, or when I pass. And no, this is not part of an elaborate plan to off myself.Hopefully this will be an ongoing lifelong change.
• My life is getting busier and busier. Wouldn’t it be nice if some aspects got simpler and simpler?
• Through this all, I hope to gain a better understanding of myself without things. (because all too often we really do define ourselves not by who we are, but by the “stuff” we own.)

Sooo.... here goes nothing...

The Power of Speech

The power of speechWhen Daniel Everett first went to live with the Amazonian Pirahã tribe in the late 70s, his intention was to convert them to Christianity. Instead, he learned to speak their unique language - and ended up rejecting his faith, losing his family and picking a fight with Noam Chomsky.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2008/nov/10/daniel-everett-amazon

Altered Esthetics + Grad School = Help me with my homework!

As part of one of my graduate classes we are conducting some group "Action Research." I'm fortunate to be on a team of people focusing on a project for an organization I'm pretty excited to be working with - Altered Esthetics. ;) Our goal is to reach and directly connect with 50 new artists, volunteers, and/or organizations. We're trying to do so with an outreach program that includes mailing, phone calls and some good old e-communication as well. I thought I should post to my personal blog too, since that just makes sense.

There are lots of different ways we'd be able to partner with a person or organization. We've got a lot of open calls already posted to our site for the rest of the year to which artists can submit work. Organizations can post an open call or event like our Día de los Muertos, or people can volunteer too.

We're trying to directly connect with people and the best way is probably through... people! So, I'm asking the people I know. Do you know an organization that might be interested in participating or telling their guests about any of our upcoming shows? Do you know an artist that you've been meaning to tell about the Awesome Ae and you just haven't gotten around to telling them yet?

Now's the time!

Altered Esthetics will appreciate any help... aaand so will the other people in my group in class.

You can direct people to me (Jamie-at-alteredesthetics.org), or send them to the website alteredesthetics.org/hello

If you want to post information to your profile, we've got some helpful text here: http://docs.google.com/Doc?id=dgdwjqxt_5c63635dx&hl=en

Thank you!

You can return to the regularly scheduled boring j-me blog post. :)

Sri Lanka - Studies

For the past few months I have been pouring over books and articles as part of one of my classes “A Natural Evolution of Religion.” Concurrently we've also been tracing the history of religion itself over the past several thousand years, and how the religion and cultures of various civilizations have been affected by politics, climate change, and natural disaster. The class is a small seminar, just 11 of us total, and has been a wonderful experience so far. In addition to the cornerstone reading for the class, each student gets to embark on their own individual journey. The topics chosen by my colleagues vary from the Tower of Babel to the First Council of Nicea and beyond. I'm focusing on the history of religion in Sri Lanka, and as I'm zeroing on my topic I'm leaning towards a topic less historical and of more relevance to the current struggle.

I've struggled a little bit in narrowing this down as I find most of what I am reading extraordinarily interesting, and it seems as though rabbit trails are quite easy to go on when doing this type of research. I'm leaning toward one of the following topics:

• The role of religious freedom in Sri Lanka's ethnic struggle.
• The problem of evangelism in modern Sri Lanka.
• Dispelling myths of Sri Lankan culture (as a means of properly understanding the current religious tension).
• The preservation of religious freedom in Sri Lanka.
• The role of the Christian Church in conflict resolutionin Sri Lanka.
• The result of colonialism: present day diverse Sri Lanka.
• “Give me your poor” - the role of religion in modern day poverty and tragedy in Sri Lanka.
• The role of U.S. citizens in Sri Lankan religious struggles.
• “Heaven on Earth” - the ulterior motives behind philanthropic endeavors in 'third world' countries.

I'll post some summaries of recent articles I've read soon. In the meantime... if anybody has any insights or thoughts, let me know. (Cousins, I'm especially talking to YOU!)

US State Department raps both Sri Lankan government and LTTE for human right violations

"Feb 26, Washington, D.C.: The United States Department of State in its 2008 country reports on human right practices flayed the Government of Sri Lanka for its poor human right record and accused the LTTE of killing and abusing a large number of civilians." Article: Sri Lanka, 2 - 26 - 2009: US State Department raps both Sri Lankan government and LTTE for human right violations

The full report can be found here: http://www.state.gov/g/drl/rls/hrrpt/2008/sca/119140.htm

Not sure how I feel about this. While I do think we should be active globally, is the US in a good place to chide other countries about human rights violations?

Blogged with the Flock Browser

What’s the biggest change that has happened to you as an adult?

Blog Homework! Below you will find my response to the following question, from my class blog:

"What’s the biggest change that has happened to you as an adult? Describe it and talk about how you’ve responded to it."

I'm very interested in how the readers of my blog would answer the above. What is the biggest change that has happened to YOU?

______

As I thought about what I would write for this post, I first thought through the most obvious changes that have happened in my adult life.

Surely, moving 2,000 miles away from my immediate family to the snowy tundra of Minnesota was a pretty big change. (For the record, my family still thinks I'm crazy.)

Perhaps starting a nonprofit gallery was a big change. It definitely has taken up quite a bit of time! However, when looking at the gallery objectively, it seems like starting it was more of a “process” then a single change, and that the process was triggered by something else entirely.

I think there have been so many events in varying scale that it would be hard to pinpoint one event over another to be the biggest “change.” I think the “change” that has had the most significant change on my life wasn't a job, a move or a relationship, but more of a change in how I view my placement in any given situation. Though might sound rather morbid, the most positive significant change I made was when I stopped viewing situations only through the lens of “what I want while I'm here?” to “what happens when I am gone?”

Death wasn't a stranger to my family, but as I aged the reality that one could die at any age became increasingly apparent. I think we all go through the process of losing the immortality we feel when we are young. We stop doing reckless things and start being more careful with our actions. Though I never felt entirely 'immortal,' I can say that I began contemplating my own mortality at a very young age, with increasing urgency as I grew older. “What about when I'm gone” was never a foreign question really, just one that I attended to with increasing practicality over time.

One of the jobs that I had throughout college was working for a small, family run manufacturing company. Though first hired as a temp receptionist, they realized I had a wide variety of computer skills and quickly put me to work in other areas of the company. Over the next few years, a remarkable thing happened: everybody that could got pregnant got pregnant - at least once. (A few became pregnant more than once and no, not all at once.) Over the course of my 6 years with the company, in addition to my own tasks, I covered for anybody who was out on maternity leave. This helped the company by decreasing potential rollover and maintaining some continuity within the office. It helped me tremendously because in a short while, I had learned all of the various aspects of running an office – from accounting, to human resources, to shipping, and more. I was also able to objectively view how all the little components worked together and I did what I could to streamline systems and computerize processes. (A side note: I also never drank the company water, because it did seem at times that pregnancy was contagious, and I wasn't quite ready for that!) Jokes aside, the most important thing I learned from this process was that sometimes it is not only important to a company what one does on the job while one is present, but what happens when that person is gone as well. The view that “I'll/she/they will always be around to take care of it” can be incredibly unrealistic. What will happen when they are gone?

Taking that “what happens when I'm gone” view and applying it to my own life, I made a series of key decisions. First and foremost, I wanted my work efforts to go toward something positive, something I could die and be content with how I spent my time. Since then, I've tried to incorporate this mentality into how I earn a living by considering with what company I work as well as with what tasks I do.

The gallery is an interesting experiment in this regard. Most people begin a company with the end-goal of being self employed or sometimes, getting rich and not being employed at all. Though the possibility of earning a living through the gallery has been brought to the table at times, the overarching, long-term goal is to develop a sustainable organization that remains a resource for the community even when I'm gone. That's not meant to sound entirely morbid. Perhaps I decide to pursue a PhD and need to move on. Perhaps somebody in my family gets very sick and I have to return to California for an extended amount of time. Life is about more than just what is a part of my day-to-day, and if I plan accordingly neither I nor my organization will be entirely overwhelmed if or when life happens.

I hope this post didn't come across as doom and gloom. Most of you know me at least a little bit by now, at least well enough to know that I don't walk around like a nihilist saying “we're all going to die, nothing matters anyway.” I also can't say that I'm entirely consistent with this process, and have had to make compromises along the way in order to work toward broader goals. I share this with you mainly because by and large, I think that changing how I view my role and how it affects others “when I'm gone” has had the positive counter-effect of making better decisions, ones that make me happier “while I'm here.”

Thanks for reading,

-Jamie

A footnote: My dog however, does not express the same sentiment towards being considerate of others when she is gone. If somebody in the class might be willing to make copies of pages 301-332 of the Leadership Challenge book I would greatly appreciate it - sometimes the “my dog ate my homework” situation really does happen.

We think therefore we are.

Random Thoughts - Ae and the Future

Ae is quickly approaching its (her?) 5 year birthday. Though still getting our balance financially in a very shaky economy, structurally things are getting better and better.

As we open things up more and as we nurture transparency within the organization, we are rewarded with greater participation and better engagement all across the board. We are seeing more initiative on the part of our board members and volunteers as they assume more active roles and responsibilities. Our interns have become an integral part of our organization, continuing our mission as they go through their own learning processes. Though I am still very much engaged throughout the organization, the additional help and support has freed me up to work more earnestly on infrastructure and sustainability. All things considered, I feel quite fortunate to be where we are currently at.

Though as with any organization there are things to be concerned about, I'm very excited about 2009 and what the end of this year will bring for Ae, both creatively and for the organization as a whole. I'm excited for the day when we will have a communicable version of this construction, one we can hopefully share with other arts organizations in the community.

I've been watching the burgeoning shifts in the business world with excitement. I wonder what the next few years will bring for the business world as a whole, and how the sharing of information and spread of technology will shape and shift the business and education structures we are so entangled in.